I have recently reached this feeling lately that the beauty of life could never be exhausted. I have found that beautiful things in life can never truly finish.
Take snorkelling for example, I could visit the same spot a million times and still feel wonderment and enjoyment. There are many creatures and corals and nature itself to keep your jaw at your ankles. You can find the feeling of peace with little to no movement as you float above a city of seaweed. The many schools of fish darting through the water, almost too difficult for the world to keep up to.
How amazing is it then, that we even get the chance to experience this life. How rare must it have been that you and I shared this plane of existence. I will forever cherish the moments we have shared together, even beyond my death.
I find myself more and more lately wanting the lasting image of me to be one of wonderment and appreciation. The infinite beauty I share with you is one I hope you share with many others to come.
I have been so incredibly lucky to have met you, to have experience the time I have had with every single person, however little or long that might have been. I could not have built up this love of beauty, wonderment and love itself if it hadn’t been for every single piece of experience.
What has dominated my thoughts lately, especially around this sensation of ending things, is the aftermath. This image of myself and what I want standing upright beyond my passing has slowly been dictating the way I act and present myself. I am trying to encourage the idea of seeking beauty. I think it is wonderful that we have this shape and form to exist in, even if all we are currently doing is our laundry. I find myself feeling my greatest when I capture moments of joy, moments of wonderment and amazement. The look of someone excited and engulfed In this current activity is what makes it worth it.
When I am out there in the waters, everything incredible I find is immediately enhanced through the eyes of someone I am sharing it with. To be in a moment with someone, excited and happy at those discoveries must be the closest we can get to defining purpose.
I love that I get to live this life and meet the people I have come across. I deeply enjoy the moments I am fortunate enough to experience with them. That is why I have a deep sadness for my departure. I have had this sinking feeling for a while at the bottom of my broken heart. It is slowly but surely getting to a point where the distant echoes of a heartbeat no longer feels infinite. I can feel the silence reaching my heart someday and I am becoming content with it. I am thankful for all the efforts made in keeping this heart going. It has allowed me to live long enough to feel beauty, wonderment and love.